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User blog:SuperSm4shWarrior/Epic Fail Battles of History 4: Avril Lavigne vs. Gene Simmons
This was inspired by a dream, yet it is the best thing ever. This is my fourth crap battle, featuring Avril Lavigne, the hottest woman in the word (wanna 1v1 me on that), against Gene Simmons, that guy from that band that nobody cares about anymore. Brace yourselves. 'Avril Lavigne' I am invincible, mofo! Can't beat me I'm so badass, even Captain Falcon is jelly! Speaking of Captain Falcon, I'll Falcon Punch your ass to Syria! Then those religious dudes will kill you like a boss! I shoot clones of Goku all night, I'm that badass! What are you? A gay guy! Nobody ever gave a crap about you since 2002 Nobody even cares that people compares me to Douchedick! 'Gene Simmons' HEAVEN'S ON FIRE! Lets get this straight. The only reason people watched your Let Me Go video..... .....is because they were looking for the song from Frozen! I'm even more badass than you! Like a boss, bitch! THIS! IS! SPARTA! 'Avril Lavigne' What was that? I can't hear you over my baddassery. Just like if this were Mega Swampert vs. Amanda Bynes! 'Gene Simmons' Exactly! I'm the Mega Swampert! 'Chad Kroeger' WHAT UP BITCH, I GOT A 1-UP, BITCH WHAT'S INSIDE MAH QUESTION BLAWK? IT'Z MAH DICK! IT'SA ME, MARIO, I'M MORE ITALIAN THAT PASTRAMI I'LL TAKE YOU BY THE PEACHES AND GIVE YOU THE HOT SALAMI I'LL SAVE YOU FROM DRAGONS AND EVIL BOOS THAT ARE SPOOKY MUST I BE A RACCOON TO GET INSIDE YOUR TANOOKI? I WILL MOUNT YOU LIKE YOSHI AND SHOW YOU THINGS YOU'VE NEVER SEEN MY MUSHROOM'S NOW MEGA, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN SO SUCK IT! 'Deryck Whibley' "Mario", don't do this shit I liked a girl and you ruined it By yelling stuff about your dick Until they walk away 'Fire Kraken (Skylanders)' You two, shut up! I was supposed to marry the swagmaster! It was in Llama's SSBB fanfic! 'Fire Kraken (Yu-Gi-Oh)' Please, I am the best Fire Kraken, I'm even bigger But nobody cares, let's get this battle heated up! OHHHHH! 'Fire Kraken (Wizard 101)' What's the point of this? I'm a freaking magic spell, and these are my opponents? A crazy person, a demon, an even crazier person, some random dude, a midget, and a guy famous for censorship? SCREW THIS! (the Swap Force Skylanders back up Fire Kraken from Skylanders, with Stink Bomb rapping and the remaining 14 as backup dancers) 'Stink Bomb' Shaking my ass, watching myself You guys all stink, and that's saying a lot! I literally have ninja farts! 'Swap Force Skylanders' OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! 'DMX' Where the hood, where the hood, where the hood at? 'Douchedick' The world only needs one stupid crazy talentless whore, and that's me! 'DamasterW' Get back in the bed, Miley! Can I pull you're tongue? 'Chad Kroeger' IT'Z MAH DICK 'Fluttershy' Uh..... Is this legal? 'North America' What is this? 'Leonidas' THIS! IS! A PARODY OF PROBLEM! 'Ariana Grande' (nonsensical singing) (mixed swears) (complaints about how Victorious was cancelled) I AM NOT AVRIL LAVIGNE! 'Avrilana Grandigne' Now I am! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! 'Iggy Azalea' Who dat, who dat, I-G-G-Y You all idiots must get ready to die (Iggy pulls out a chainsaw, but it is punched by Cooper from his comic series, Cooper Comics) 'Cooper' Yo, free hugs. 'Bart Baker and Shane Dawson' Oh look, a new hit song Let's parody it! We'll also make the characters look and act like that smoked too much weed! 'Snoop Dogg' Did somebody mention weed? 'Chad Kroeger' IT'Z MAH DICK (crazy fanboys shoot Fire, Chad, and Deryck, and run up to Avril Lavigne) 'Crazy Fanboys' SCREW THOSE GUYS! LET'S MAKE BABIES! LOL, I'M BADASS! 'Luigi' Yo, whaddap? (Luigi death stare) 'Dead or Alive' You spin me right round baby Right round like a record, baby Right round, round, round! 'Flo Rida' Hey, you stole my song! That's just wrong! Ke$ha likes bongs! Suck my ding dong! Bangin' a gong, just like I banged your mom! I eat with tongs! In other words, you're gay! 'Duncan from TDI' Duncan in the house, Imma kill all of you! You're just a bunch of moose-headed, anus-kissing, overweight pussies! 'Queen Elsa' Let 'em burn Let 'em burn 'Puff Puff Humbert' You're all Shitty G's! 'Snoop Dogg' Smoke weed everyday! 'Chad Kroeger' IT'Z MAH DICK 'Yoshi' Shut up! You're gay! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YO- (the announcer is humped by Dankey Kang) 'Dankey Kang' Gotta go bananas! Expand dong! I'd shower you in coconut cream pies! Who won? Avril Lavigne Gene Simmons Chad Kroeger Deryck Whibley Fire Kraken, Swap Force Skylanders, and DMX Fire Kraken Fire Kraken Miley "Douchedick" Cyrus DamasterW Fluttershy North America Leonidas Ariana Grande Avrilana Gradnigne Iggy Azalea Cooper Bart Baker and Shane Dawson Snoop Dogg Crazy Fanboys Luigi Dead or Alive Flo Rida Duncan Queen Elsa Puff Puff Humbert Yoshi ERB Announcer Dankey Kang Ximena 13 EpicLlamaSwag42 Joan of Arc Alison Brie Squidgy (Of Mice and Men) Goomy Shrek IT'Z MAH DICK Category:Blog posts